2 hours has past and still, no progress despite being a tad motivated after the short sms. seriously, the enemy is just there waiting and taking every opportunity to steal, kill and destroy. i'm so annoyed and frustrated at myself now for letting me let go of those opportunities. i can be wide awake when talking on the phone and the moment i end the call, my eyes become all so tiny again and the words i read become all fuzzy. maybe cause talking nonsense with E is always so entertaining and interesting. he proposed a question that has got me thinking. bad timing, i know. but i can't help it! promise i'll give you an answer in time! anyway, what i wanted to say is that all my initial intentions never seem to follow through and result in the end. makes me wonder if i'm weak? not strong enough to carry on and strive for what i was set out to do? lack the determination, the discipline to really force myself to do it. why? maybe i'm too complacent thinking i'll pass it and that it'll be alright, when in actual fact, the possibility of me failing still exist. the longer i procrastinate, the bigger the chances are for me to fail it. gosh.. somehow, i really hope i'll be able to manage this in one day. SOMEHOW. keeping my fingers crossed and praying hard. |